Cure Kevin

This past Thurs. was another Chemo day, so, as usual, my body is in a real mess from all the drugs that I get on those eventful days (although now that I know this mix is working, I don’t hold quite as much animosity toward Chemo Days as I used to!). One of the problems with the stuff they pump into me on Chemo Day is that it keeps me wired and awake until all hours of the night. Normally I just sit around and watch TV, but we had the girls home, it was mid-season for all the good shows, so we turned the TV off and actually had a family conversation; something we haven’t done in quite a while.

We talked a lot about how we raised our kids and how Leah is raising Anya. We talked about the standards we set for our girls and how they reacted to them. We talked about the fact that none of our girls have ever seen Melanee and I fight and how they learned conflict resolution from that. We talked about a lot of serious stuff, but with a lot of fun and laugh-filled experiences added in to make it an absolutely wonderful time with the family.

It really made me proud to see how well our girls have turned out; how they’ve taken the things we’ve tried to teach them and truly incorporate those values into their lives. I know that I have created a powerful legacy of a family that will be true assets in whatever they do. They will be a positive influence in whatever community they are involved in, and, probably most important of all, will continue to pass along these values to their own family.

It was an amazing night that gave me some wonderful insights into how our parenting techniques have worked out (not perfectly, but pretty good). It makes me proud beyond description to see how well our daughters have turned out.

Wow! I don’t think any of us thought we’d get so much in the way of donations so quickly!! THANK YOU for all your help in getting us so close to our goal. We’ve still got plenty of time to keep raising money, so if you haven’t had a chance to donate, please do so at our fund raising site. As Marlene has said so well in her comments, Pancreatic Cancer gets so little attention, any help with fund raising we can send its way is very much appreciated. And don’t let the goal amount stop us! We can exceed the goal by as much as we want!

Marlene and Rachel are working really hard to be ready for the marathon and knowing that so many of you are supporting them really gives us all a boost. Again, Thank You for your contribution and your support of Marlene and Rachel; it means more to us than you may ever know.

All along I’ve talked about how much faith we have, the power of people’s prayers in getting us through all that we have to go do to survive and deal with my cancer. All this positive energy has really helped us keep a positive attitude, especially through the dark times.

Melanee and I were both looking forward to the results of my last CAT Scan with a fair amount of dread; neither one of us wanted to hear bad news. And I’m not sure that we could have survived hearing bad news, especially with the holiday season on its way. But having the CAT Scan results say “you’re getting better” actually brings a HUGE measure of hope that adds an amazing push to the faith we already have. It actually tells us that all the work we’ve done, all the drugs we’ve ingested, all the chemo we’ve put up with, all the side effects we’ve lived with, all the prayers people have said for us are really doing something to get us toward our goal of being active again. It made us feel that we were doing more than just waiting to die.

It was amazing how up-beat I felt when I heard that tumors had actually disappeared. The overwhelming feeing of success filled our whole house and so many others have shared in that amazing feeling with us. I know it’s only been 6 months since my initial diagnosis, but it seems forever that I’ve been dealing with the effects of the different chemo mixes and other drugs to keep me going; and when you can’t see the light at the end of the tunnel (heck, you’re not even sure you’re IN a tunnel!), finally seeing that light and knowing that its a good light brings such an amazing change in attitude its hard to describe.

I’ve had a lot of people compliment me on my keeping such a positive attitude and, while I do have a positive attitude about beating this cancer, sometimes… no, a lot of times… the face was just a face and inside I was feeling completely torn up. I have a brother-in-law that has kidney cancer and often times we’ll ask each other if we’re still fooling people that we’re doing well … yeah, sometimes. But now, now that we KNOW that the chemo is working, that smile I’m wearing, that feeling of success, that feeing of HOPE is real and has fueled my fight just that much more. Now, I’m looking forward to my next CAT Scan (sometimes in Feb.) to reinforce the fact that I’m still killing the invading disease and will eventually beat this evil beast.

That is what our doctor told us today. We do believe it is a miracle because of all your prayers and faith that we will have a positive outcome. I am so thankful to all who have included us in your thoughts and prayers. We feel a euphoria as we enter the Christmas season. Grateful for the gift of His Son and for the gift of Life. May we always remember the Lord and His guiding hand in all of our lives.

Kevin and I will continue on our journey, ready to walk the path that has been laid before us. With faith and courage we move forward and accept whatever comes. We look toward our Savior so he can guide us along. We are blessed to have a true Christmas miracle.

–Melanee

We finally got the initial results for the CAT Scan tonight…. two of the lesions on my liver have gone away and the other tumors have pretty much stayed the same. This was VERY much needed good news.

We’ll find out what’s next and the other details tomorrow when we meet with the doctor, but for now, we’re all on Cloud Nine. Melanee and I both agree that, outside having the kids home for Christmas, this is the best Christmas gift we could have gotten. Emotions are running high in our household tonight!

Well, it’s been a busy weekend… I had my chemo treatment on Thurs. and, as usual, was wiped out pretty good all weekend. In fact, I pretty much slept all day Sunday; I didn’t wake up until after noon, cat-napped all afternoon, then headed to bed fairly early. Partly because I was still tired, and partly because I had to be at the hospital for my CAT Scan by 7:30 AM… I haven’t been up that early in a long time!

As usual, I got my lovely cocktail of Contrast Drink which was as nasty as is always is. Other than that, the scan was pretty un-eventful.

The best part of the day was having Leah and Anya fly in for Christmas. Leah was pretty sick from the flight, but she and Anya have added their usual ray of sunshine to the house. Having an energetic two-year-old in the house is pretty draining, but is a blessing to have. All we need are the rest of the kids here and the CAT Scan results and life will be complete!

We just had a wonderful time with Kevin’s parents and his two sisters over the weekend. His parent’s came from California and Tami came from Oregon and Allison came from Utah. Kev’s family doesn’t have many opportunities to visit us due to the distance. We certainly enjoyed the time we had together and wish we could get together more. What a treat! Kev and I have felt their strong faith that he will do well as he fights this battle.

Our activities were conversation, driving to look at Christmas lights, do a few projects around the house, and exchange recipes. Mostly they wanted to be with Kev and go with his schedule of resting and sleeping.

Kev’s family attended church with us and got to see Kev in action as he taught Christmas songs to the 3-11 year olds. Kevin is teaching them a sweet song called “Star Bright” The children are so excited to sing it in English and in Spanish. They will be singing the song during our Sacrament Meeting on Christmas Eve. We loved having his family there to show them the children’s eager faces as they try to learn.

Now we are back on the chemo schedule. He just had his last infusion Thursday,(yesterday). We were there longer because it took Kev a while to get up the energy in the morning to get going. We got to the center by 10:30 am. We didn’t get home till 5:30 pm. He got weighed and he hasn’t lost any weight. I am proud of him for eating even though there may be days he doesn’t feel like it. Chemo changes tastes and smells so it’s very hard to have an appetite for any food.

He also has his 5FU friend again. Whirring away. It will be disconnected Saturday.Then we have the CAT scan scheduled for Monday to see if this flavor is working. I hope and pray this chemo is working. We can really use some better news right now.–Melanee

Last week, Leah’s husband Ed lost his uncle to a long battle with cancer. Our heart goes out to his family for their loss, on a lot of different levels. It’s hard to have a family member finally loose that kind of battle. The silver lining to this sad event was that Ed and Leah made a quick sprint from Florida to Connecticut and were able to stay with us for a couple of days.

Of course it was great to see Ed and Leah, but the real treat was our Granddaughter Anya. With all the events that were going on with Ed’s family, we got to spend a fair amount of one-on-one with Anya. Now that she’s 2 years old, she’s a bundle of energy and talks a million miles an hour! Her vocabulary is very extensive and she’s using her words in context; I’m sure she’s only a couple of weeks away from real sentences.

Having Leah, Ed, and especially Anya here, even for the short time they were, was a huge pick-up for me. I love having Anya around to play with (although I don’t have near enough energy to keep up with her!) and seeing Ed and Leah. Its tough having your kids scattered around the country. I know people say “you’re only an air plane ride away”, but those airplane rides are getting more and more expensive, not to mention the time involved in getting to the airport, getting through security, dealing with delays… you all know the joys of air travel these days! It’s much nicer to have the family close, but I also know that with today’s job market, you go where the money is… and the girls are still only a plane ride away!

Leah wasn’t able to stay very long (they were back on the road Sunday night), but the time they were here was wonderful. Even though it was a Chemo Weekend, Anya’s energy seemed to spill over into me and energize me enough that I could enjoy their stay. They’ll be back in a couple of weeks for the Christmas holiday and we’re all looking forward to having a house full of the energy of Family once again… and of course getting another good dose of my 2 year old medicine!

I haven’t posted in a while and I thought I’d give you an update on how my Half Marathon training is going.

Alright, I gotta be honest. I haven’t been quite as diligent with the running as I should have been, or at least I haven’t trained as hard as Auntie Rachie. I still ran, just not very much. Today was very very c-o-l-d outside and I wasn’t sure if I wanted to run or not. Of course Dad pushed me to run and so I hopped on the treadmill and, well, ran.

I felt a bit like Forest Gump on that treadmill. I just wanted to keep going and going, but I didn’t. I stopped at 7 miles but those 7 miles sure did feel good. I have missed Runner’s High so much. When I’m pushing it as hard as I can in that last half mile or so it just makes me feel like I can conquer the world and that’s really what I need right now.

I am so proud and so honored to be able to do this Half Marathon and I really believe that it will help someone out there who’s suffering from Pancreatic Cancer or anyone who can benefit from the research. This means a lot to me, especially since although Pancreatic Cancer has one of the highest mortality rate, it’s the least funded. That just doesn’t make sense to me so I’m trying to change that. Of course sometimes I forget the real reason for my training and lax a bit, but that doesn’t change why I’m even doing this.

I can’t get over all the support that you all have been giving us and I can’t thank you enough. I never thought that so many people would pull together just to pull you through.

Thanks

~Marlene

Over the weekend Ed, Anya and I all got to go up to CT to visit(sort of) my parents. It was a quick emergency trip but we were so glad we got to go. It was a lot of driving but seeing how well my Dad is doing is great. Anya was so excited to see her Grandma and Honka. Since we have been home, every time we get in the car she says,”Honka house?” I was so impressed at how much hair my Dad has now. He looks very good. I hadn’t seen him since July so I was a little worried about what we would see but he is doing great. I am amazed at how strong my family is and how generous and kind all the people around are. We are so excited to move closer to see them more. I am truly grateful for the wonderful people in my Parents lives. Mom said she was going to write a post that said Granddaughter therapy but she hasn’t so I thought I would. Until they add their side…

Leah